Avast ye scurvy knaves! September 19th be International Talk Like a Pirate day, arrr!!! Now 10 years old to boot(y), International Talk Like a Pirate day be the one day of the year we all gets to talk like pirates all day long!
Pirates Celebrating (source: Associated Pirate Press)
Get the most out of it by following our guide to the best pirate fun, or prepare to walk the plank… arrr!!!!
1) Work off that grog, Cap’n!
Arrr Jim lad, start the day as ye means to go on, and lose some weight to boot! The Pirate Diet be an essential means for any self respecting bucanneer looking to shed ye a few pounds sos as he can better carry a few pounds more! The Pirate Diet is the preferred diet of the Pirates of the Carob Bean… arrrr!!!
2) Ward off Scurvy, knaves!
Of course, to ward off the scurvy, makes sure ye prepares yerself a Scottish Duff, an authentic pirate dish courtesy of those jolly rogers at Marie Curie Cancer Care. There’s plenty o’booty to be found on their special International Talk like a Pirate Day microsite!
3) Sail the Interweb Sea!
The Patron saint of International Talk Like a Pirate Day is none other than Robert Newton, who played Long John Silver in the 50s TV Series The Adventures of Long John Silver. Whilst ye be on the Internet, why not visit the official talk like a pirate day site, the UK site, where you can learn how to talk like a pirate and have ye a read of Robert Louis Stephenson’s classic Treasure Island, courtesy of Project Gutenberg. Ye should be especially thankful that copyright laws permit ye to do this without having to resort to piracy on the high web, so ye may want to visit the EFF. May they protect ye from Repellant Imperialist Arrrr-souls in the Area or any More Predictable Arrr-Souls Around.
4) Make peace with the big man/spaghetti monster upstairs
For some people, Talk Like a Pirate Day is more than just a day of sail hoisting, mainbrace splicing, and swashbuckling. For Pastafarians, dressing up and talking like a pirate is an almost daily part of their religion. They believe that natural disasters are directly linked to the decrease in the number of pirates over the last 200 years. I don’t know if these men are scurvy knaves, or tellin’ the truth Jim lad, but I’ll tell ye now, if dressing up and talking like a Pirate helps the environment, then I’m all for it!
5 Sing the Pirate’s International Anthem
Finally, the most important thing ye should do on International Talk Like a Pirate day is sit down with a pint of grog in one hand, a wench in the other (or a pint of grog in one hand, and a Pirate in the other if ye be a wench of such persuasion), and join in singing the Pirate’s International Anthem, take it away boys!
Sing Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum:
‘Twas a cutlass swipe or and ounce of lead or a
Yawning hole in a battered head
and the scuppers glut with a yawning red and
There they lay aye damn my eyes
All lookouts clapped on par – a – dise all
Souls bound just con – tra – ri – wise
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
Fifteen men of ‘em good and true
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
Every man Jack could ha’ sailed with old Pew
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
There was chest on chest of Spanish gold with a
Ton of plate in the middle hold
And the cabins riot with stuff un told As
They lay there that had took the plum
With a sightless glare and their lips struck dumb
While we stuck our bottle up anothers mans bum
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
Fifteen men on a dead man’s chest
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
Drink and the devil had done for the rest
Yo ho ho and a hairy crack bum
We wrapped ‘em all in a mains’l tight with
Twice ten turns of a hausers bight
And we heaved ‘em over and out of sight with a
Yo heave ho and fare you well
And a sullen plunge in a sullen swell
Ten fathoms deep on the road to ****
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum
Shiver me timbers! And a very merry International Talk Like a Pirate Day to ye all!
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